Fear

I recently caught myself worrying - worrying a lot.  And I stopped to try and figure out what was going on in my mind.  I was not in immediate danger.  The situations I was worried about would have me in low amounts of danger.  I was not enjoying the present at all because I was focused on these worries.  I saw two main components to my fear - I was trying to ensure I would experience pleasure at all times in my future and that I would continually avoid displeasure.  

When I forget the essence of life, this dual focus seems very reasonable.  Finding pleasure is one of the highest humanistic aims.  Experiencing pleasure brings us excitement, motivation, contentedness, and rest.  Pleasure draws us in with promise.  The avoidance of displeasure is crucial as well.  Displeasure can take many forms including anxiousness and loneliness.  It drains us of energy and makes us wish our situation was different.  

But the essence of life is life with God.  This life does not prioritize the goals of finding pleasure and avoiding displeasure.  I am free to pursue both goals as I live, but I have a much more exciting path that I am led along.  My priority is living in God’s life and this life is complicated, thrilling and the opposite of self-absorbed.  

As I am led away from self-absorbed experiences, I experience less and less fear.  My attempts to find pleasure and avoid displeasure are shifted to an appropriate secondary priority.  I have more freedom and I have less mental distress.